March 09, 2005

Oregon- The New Berkeley

Surely this has to be a joke site: Ocean Haven.

FOR REASONS OF HEALTH & SAFETY

OCEAN HAVEN CANNOT ACCOMMODATE SMOKERS,

PETS, FOLKS TRAVELING IN A HUMMER, OR

FOLKS WHO VOTED FOR BUSH & HIS NATURE DESTRUCTIVE POLICIES

Okay, I don't have pets or a Hummer, but I'm very tempted to take up cigars, buy a pit bull, rent the HumVee, slap a big "Bush Won, Get The Fuck OVER IT Already" bumpersticker on it, and drive on up there. Maybe use my NRA membership card as I.D. for the room.
Holy crap. Resorts for complete moonbats, what will they think of next?
Cheesy thanks to Cerebus Blog for finding this originally.

PS... apparently the Ocean Haven folk got a little upset about the attention and have pulled the Voters caveat from the front page of the site. However, you can find it under "Nature Friendly" in the "Practices" section, or for the original front page, here's the Google cached version. "We Welcome Diversity", my ass.
Thank you to commenter Fripp over at Wizbang for finding this.

Posted by LeeAnn at March 9, 2005 03:07 PM | TrackBack
Comments

Well, I sure as heck ain't going there.

Maximum 4 persons on the largest rooms -- we got 5. (But only 4 dates of birth....) And the SUV, while not a Hummer, might disqualify us.

And the menu looks like it doesn't have any gluten-free/dairy-free stuff on it, which one of my kids needs.

And how the hell would they know how you voted, anyway?

Posted by: Julia at March 9, 2005 03:50 PM

LOL! I love how they post "We welcome diversity" on the Practices tab and immediately below that list no smoking, no pets, no hummers, no visitors and no Bush-voters. Their "rules" probably include no eating, drinking or pooping too. I absolutely HAVE to call them tomorrow!

Posted by: neonangel at March 9, 2005 09:51 PM

Just so you all know, it's the freakin people that MOVE here that open places like these.
NATIVE Oregonians are tolerant, happy, hippie people that welcome you smokers and your pets.

Posted by: Greg at March 10, 2005 01:57 AM

Bummer...I voted for Bush and drive a Hummer. Guess that I won't be staying there. Asshole treehuggers.

Posted by: elliott at March 10, 2005 05:48 AM

At least Tampa is now safe for Republicans:

TAMPA - Michelle Fernandez dialed 911 from her sport utility vehicle in a panic.
``I was just almost run off the road,'' the Tampa woman told a dispatcher on a tape released Wednesday. ``I have a Bush bumper sticker on my car. He drove up to me with some sign on his window about the war in Iraq.''

``I'm shaking like a leaf,'' she said. ``Now he's following me.''

Officers charged a man with felony aggravated stalking Tuesday after the chain of events Fernandez described.

About 5:15 p.m. Tuesday, Fernandez encountered a man police identified as Nathan Alan Winkler, 31, while driving south on Armenia Avenue near Columbus Drive.

Fernandez, 34, was traveling with her daughters, ages 10 and 3, when a driver in a black 1996 Nissan pulled alongside her, honking his horn, flailing his arms and pointing at her, a police report states.

Fernandez could not see his face, police said, because over the passenger front window was a handwritten sign: ``Never Forget Bush's Illegal Oil War Murdered Thousands in Iraq.''

The Nissan's driver tried to force Fernandez off the road by driving into her lane, police said. Fernandez called 911.

Her call lasted about nine minutes. During the call, Fernandez gave the Nissan's license plate number and described the man following her along Kennedy Boulevard and surrounding streets.

At one point, the dispatcher tried to calm her and direct her to the Tampa police district office on Dale Mabry Highway and Tampa Bay Boulevard.

``Listen to what I'm trying to tell you, ma'am,'' the dispatcher said.

``He's going to hurt my kids. I can't,'' Fernandez interrupted, cursing at the other driver to ``get away from me.''

Later, the dispatcher heard a horn honking. ``Was that him?'' the dispatcher asked.

``No,'' Fernandez said. ``I'm blowing the horn at somebody because I'm running stop lights and everything else to get away from him.''

She lost the man at a stop sign moments later and asked the dispatcher to send an officer to meet her at the West Tampa ball field next to Macfarland Park.

Police traced the license plate to Winkler and found him at home. ``He told them he was upset because the victim flipped him off and `that's why I pursued her,' '' police spokesman Joe Durkin said.

Durkin said police found the sign inside the Nissan.

``It appears he has it in his car ready for any Republicans he encounters,'' Durkin said.

Winkler was released Wednesday from Orient Road Jail on $2,000 bail. Jail records list him as a contractor with AT&T. He did not return a phone call or answer the door Wednesday.

Winkler has no prior criminal record in Florida. If convicted, he faces up to five years in prison.


Posted by: Karla at March 10, 2005 12:37 PM