The couple across the hall are calling it quits, after ten years of marriage. Fortunately for the entertainment quotient around here, they're doing it in a very loud and public way.
We now know, for example, that Mr. has uncontrollable gas and a very unreliable erection. We've also learned that Mrs. will do it with basically any delivery person and/or census taker and has a resistant toenail fungus that she disguises with designer nail polish.
Mr. stuffs his undies. Mrs. stuffs her face.
No one is really sure who the father of the teenage son is. Mr. says he can't even be sure that Mrs. is the mother.
(I'm still puzzling that one out. )
On the downside of this ongoing demonstation of how lawyers make buckets of money, Mr. and Mrs. are dying to recruit bystanders to their individual causes and you have to move fast to avoid the "he said she said" buttonholing that results if you're caught.
I've set my alarm for 2:00AM. I need to go get my mail.
You've gotta move out of that room you live in on the Springer set.
Posted by: Jeff at May 13, 2004 06:15 AMSounds like a wonderful business opportunity - you could gather an audience, sell refreshments, create coffee mugs, t-shirts, caps. Call it Who Gets the Cheese. Have the audience vote on who is winning which argument. Yeah, I see a fortune in it...
Posted by: Teresa at May 13, 2004 07:47 AMEvery time I hear about a couple divorcing, I look at Beloved Wife, hold her close, and resolve to continue doing whatever it takes to never let that happen to us.
Scary stuff, those unhappy marriages.
Posted by: Harvey at May 13, 2004 10:49 AM