May 02, 2004

Miffed (And Really, Is A Miff As Good As A Mile?)

My computer is constipated. Rather, let's be clear and restate: my internet connection is constipated. Let's be even more needlessly graphic clear: my ISP appears to have taken a tremendous, diarrhetic dump into my modem.
What I'm trying oh so delicately to say is, things are pretty shitty, computer-wise.

Most every page I've tried to access, both in IE6 and Mozilla 1.5, times out. Reloading sometimes works, but not always. Pictures come through about 1/10 of the time. Some pages just look extremely off, like something stripped all the prettiness code out.
Why, yes, it does sound like a virus... but...
(And how could I have a post about how shitty things are without having a "but"?)
I have run Norton, with updated virus definitions, several times. I have run AdAware, Spybot Blaster, and Clean Center. I tried to run the Symantec online check but that's kind of futile when the main problem is nothing will load.
I've downloaded nothing new prior to all this poopla. I've deleted nothing.
And naturally, when I called the ISP, they said why, of course there's nothing untoward going on in your area, you are just inept and cootie-ridden.... but
(see? another "but"!) we are having just a tad bit of trouble determining that your cable modem is functioning, so we'll send a guy to check it out.
So here I am, stalled on the side of the information highway, which has become an information dirt path through the woods, littered with trodden-upon poo.
Until later tomorrow, when allegedly the cable guy will come and fix everything all better.

Yes, as I re-read this I realize it is possibly the most boring, self-serving, whiny post but yet I feel compelled nonetheless to share with you this dark side of the Cheese.
Sorry. Smart-assery and tarded neighborhood tales will resume once I can face the keyboard and not cry in frustration.
I bet I hit "save" and it times out and I lose all this.
Damn.

Posted by LeeAnn at May 2, 2004 09:26 AM | TrackBack
Comments

Excellent! Got your Bonfire entry all set I see.

Posted by: Jim at May 2, 2004 11:29 AM

I can relate, and I must say that you are handling it all much better than I would. I completely unglue when this magic box betrays me.

Posted by: Parkway Rest Stop at May 2, 2004 11:55 AM

Have you defraged the hard-drive?

Posted by: Alan Kellogg at May 2, 2004 02:55 PM

Alan- Yep, I defrag once a week whether it thinks I need it or not.
Jim(Snooze)- I thought of that as soon as I hit "save'. :)
Jim(Parkway)- The GM1 can attest to the screaming and wailing that went on backstage. I always feel so betrayed when the computer is wonked.... much as I do when the car gets testy.

Posted by: LeeAnn aka Cheesemistress at May 2, 2004 03:47 PM

What you need to do is reticulate the splines... well that or a little percussive maintainence...

In english, I think something needs to be kicked. The computer, the modem, the cable guy, any of the above will make it better.

Posted by: xade at May 2, 2004 05:25 PM

Love the new look. I think I'm gonna start stalking your title graphic, so you might want to just go ahead & get a restraining order now.

And I hope your computer problems clear up soon.

Posted by: Harvey at May 2, 2004 08:47 PM

Well, Harvey, you said you wanted more LeeAnn pictures, didn't you? *casually whistling as she takes her artistic license and runs with it*

Posted by: LeeAnn aka Cheesemistress at May 2, 2004 09:38 PM

Pixy's First Law.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at May 3, 2004 02:55 AM

Pixy, you knew all when the rest of us were still using tin cans and string. :)

Posted by: LeeAnn aka Cheesemistress at May 3, 2004 04:16 AM