1. I heard the weirdest song lyric on the radio... "Your bone has a tiny machine." Now I'm wondering if you have to get a tiny mechanic to work on it if it dysfunctions.
2. I will stomp you to dust if you try to snatch my copy of "The Incredibles" out of my hand, child. Four years old ain't too young to learn the wisdom of keeping your hands to yourself.
3. Target will let anyone shop there. I think they should have a bouncer. Isn't Mr. T available? Or is he doing Grape Nuts commercials in Japan?
4. I watched a teensy tiny security guard stand quietly by as two all-but-flying-the-colors wannabe Blood-or-Crips kids threw gang signs and yelled "niggah!" at each other just inside the store. Then I saw the cell phone in her hand and understood her passivity when the four burly fellow guards she'd called stormed the building and taught the unruly brats what "full nelson" means.
5. Why in the HELL do I not carry my camera round with me?
6. I love snails. Snails are the only bug I tolerate... okay, butterflies and ladybugs...if you're cute, you can have extra legs. Or none. We have tons of snails around here, more numerous when it rains, and I set aside an extra five minutes on the way to anywhere so I can stop at each wandering snail and relocate him to a safe place off the sidewalk.
7. This is because, despite my best efforts, the sidewalks are littered with squished snails, trampled by barbarians. I watch the survivors creeping past the paste that was their friends and think it's like the Baatan Death Crawl.
8. Snails should come with a warranty. Or at least a spatula.
9. Easter means Cadbury caramel eggs round these parts.
10. There was a gorilla-suited sign twirler at the rental office today, with a sign begging people to take advantage of the "super rent specials". This is exactly why we have the high-quality neighbors we all enjoy.
11. Also why the bananas are missing.
12. Did I mention I bought "The Incredibles" today? Then what am I doing here?
13. Must make popcorn first.
"Snails should come with a warranty. Or at least a spatula"
That's just too funny! What does a person have to do to get a mind that works like yours?
Posted by: Rob at March 20, 2005 04:10 AMCadbury eggs! Yum! They are good after having been in the freezer.
Posted by: Boudicca at March 20, 2005 07:45 AMHope you have a surround-sound home theater to watch "The Incredibles" with, THX Digital Sound really does that movie justice.
Posted by: whiskytangofoxtrot at March 21, 2005 06:35 AM