(A tale constructed entirely from various searches that led to this blog.)
Chapter One: In The Beginning
the cheese stands alone
Chapter Two: Sex Rears Its Ugly Head
Part One
porn fairy tales
lee ann tweeden
pink panties
cherry popping
naked bottoms
biggest penis
Part Two
nice game
big daddy suv
you wear the mask
sausage of power
spanking britney spears
spare the rod
Chapter Three: The Politics
never get involved in a land war in asia
protected class
horseshoes and hand grenades
hark i hear the cannons roar
push the button max
Chapter Four: Of Dancing
two and a half men theme song
men men men men manly men
snoopy happy dance
bloody bazouki
cannot carry a tune in a bucket
Chapter Five: Psychological Warfare Continues
listen and look photo for plant can control men penis
worlds smallest penis
margaret thacher
naked pictures of bea arthur
smallest penis ever
i want my two dollars
Chapter Six: A Word From Our Sponsors
goldbach cheese plymouth
Chapter Seven: Evolution Of Fashion
Part One:
jennifer lopez s ass
backwards thong
cheese waxer
underwear invisible
Part Two:
bum cheese
tom jones panties
unbearable itch in crotch
Part Three:
addams family wardrobe
christina ricci undies
good girl knee socks
Part Four:
butt showing droopy drawers
cheese boxers
Chapter Eight: Wild Kingdom
Part One:
monkeymonkeymonkey
elephant cake
Part Two:
rubber rats
cat regurgitation
how to wash a cat
Part Three:
goat trauma
he took a duck in the face at two hundred knots
Part Four:
kitten poop in sleep
goldfish poop
Chapter Nine: The Inquisition
how what hmph mean?
slipped my mind
thick as two short planks
Chapter Ten: Medical Science Marches On
a disease called scruvy
lime in da coconut
nyquil and vodka
cure warts
nuclear brain surgery
Chapter Eleven: Crime and Punishment
pictures from aryan baby farm
coworker offended
ask not for whom the bell tolls
surrender my greencard
owen wilson tied up and gagged
Chapter Twelve: World Travels
Part One:
where can i find what a red ruffle lemur looks like?
madasgascar today
Part Two:
bad neighbors
naked vietnamese
korean dog recipes
Chapter Thirteen: A Pop Quiz
today s riddle
what phylum is cheese
faulty logic
today s riddle
why do men go to strip bars
paul harvey gonads
Chapter Fourteen: Public Speaking
she turned me into a newt
randy lay there like a slug
nobody does it like adventures of hoover
i killed the president of paraguay with a fork
salary comparative income chart chihuahua
shove your team building holidays up your ass
Chapter Fifteen: The Balance of Power
lord of the cheese
cheese makes your boobs bigger
fat chicks never roll alone
testicle ownership
Oh my, the searches that you're goona get at your site now.
That's where these all came from in the first place. :)
Posted by: LeeAnn at February 16, 2005 02:42 PMNow I'm amazed that you were able to keep track! ;-)
Posted by: elliott at February 16, 2005 02:44 PMYou amaze me.....just how on earth you come up with ideas like this - turning those into a post/novel....amazing, yep - well either that or sick/twisted, but I'm thinkin' amazing! ;-)
Posted by: Tammi at February 16, 2005 05:09 PMYou're a genius, LeeAnn. An evil genius, perhaps, but a genius nonetheless.
Posted by: zonker at February 16, 2005 10:11 PMOh my god ... that was hilarious. All I ever get is people looking for naked traffic wardens...
Posted by: Rob at February 17, 2005 01:10 AMMan I need to add more twisted sayings to my posts. I get dull boring search strings... I'm still getting searches for "Kerry's Voting Record" - of all the stupid things!!! My search string novella would put everyone out like a light... anyone have insomnia?
Posted by: Teresa at February 17, 2005 09:11 AMVery creative! Next you should try writing a play with them or doing some cutup poetry.
Posted by: Amanda at February 17, 2005 10:48 AMWow.
That is too funny.
naked pictures of bea arthur
I could have gone the rest of my life without that sentence *scrubs eyes with brillo pad*
Posted by: Azygos at February 18, 2005 07:02 AM