Random comments from the GM1 during the Academy Awards last night.....
On Billy Crystal's perky man boobs displayed during his nakedity in the opening sketch: "I'll be in the other room, call me when this is over. C'mon, I just ate."
On the fashion choices of most women attending:
"Look, another one! Geez, every woman here is pulling a train tonight."
On Sean Penn's win: "Shit! Fuck shit! Bloody hell fuck shit!.... sorry... Sean Penn gives me Tourette's."
On Jamie Lee Curtis's dress: "Where are her boobs? Did she lose her boobs? That dress ATE her boobs!"
On each instance of a Return of the King win: "THAT'S what I'm talkin' about! "
On Sofia Coppola's apparent disinterest in the whole thing: "When your daddy owns half of Hollywood, you can be Princess Attitude."
On Liv Tyler's dress: "Where are her boobs? Did she lose her boobs? THAT dress ate her boobs!"
On the constant description of each film as "uplifting": "Movies are supposed to enter-freeking-tain. If I want uplifting, I'll get a Wonderbra."
On Renee's Zellwegger's acceptance speech: "She should just go over, kneel down and blow Harvey Weinstein... that's what this is, foreplay. "
On Angelina's Jolie dress: "See, now THOSE are boobs. She has very professional nipples. "
On Angelina Jolie's nipples after further consideration: "Hmmm... maybe those are stunt nipples. It can't be that cold in there."
Nope, the GM1 is not a leg man, bless his little heart.
Posted by LeeAnn at March 1, 2004 06:56 AMDefinitely stunt nipples. :)
Posted by: Lawren at March 1, 2004 06:44 AMOn Sofia - I think she's a some what introverted person. My impression is that she's shy and awkward whenever pressed to make public appearances.
On LOTR - Look, great and all but after the first half dozen awards, why couldn't they just present the rest in one presentation. I was tired waiting for all the hairy looking people to go up, make their speeches and accept yet another gold statue.
Also - in addition to all the trains, there was a lot of beige.
Did you notice Uma Thurman's tissue paper and foil dress? Talk about "where are the boobs". Wtf?
I agree about Renee. I'm sick of her thanking Harvey and telling him how much she adores him every single time she takes the stage. Ick.
Billy Crystal was looking most bloated this year. Man tits. Ick.
Posted by: Amanda at March 1, 2004 08:15 AMIf anybody finds pictures of the stunt nipples, let me know. I forgot to tape the Oscars :-(
Posted by: Harvey at March 1, 2004 08:16 AMI heard Charlize Theron stood in line when the big Oscar statues were getting a respray just before the show started.
Posted by: Fi at March 1, 2004 02:07 PMCan't we have a definite timing where everyone says THANK YOU and then POOF off the stage they go? Just stop the insanity of thanking everyone from their mom to the cab driver...PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Posted by: milehighcyn at March 1, 2004 04:44 PMI think Angelina's nipple jewelery from her piercings was what contributed to the look.
Posted by: Ith at March 1, 2004 06:06 PMThanks to you and the GM1, LeeAnn, I feel like I saw the entire thing and never had to go near my television. (And it was much more enjoyable *g*)