So, like I said (or was that one of those internal conversations I have that don't come out and then later when I pick them up in the middle like they've been outwardly ongoing the GM1 says "What the hell are you talking about? What giant sheep?"), I am getting fidgetty with the blog. I have the insane urge to tweak and twist and twiddle all the twaddle that's on it.
I know a template is like a newborn puppy. If you mess with it too much, it loses all its fur and piddles all over you. I don't know if I have the appropriate cleaning supplies, what with the stupid supermarket strikes, and damn you for a bunch of selfish cows anyway, supermarket workers, you make damn near as much per hour as teachers, yes, teachers, and you are screaming because you have to pay for most of your own health insurance because you have the supreme talent of yelping "Price check on jumbo Trojan Party Pack!" over the loudspeaker and I got news for you, bunny, most of us have jobs that pay a lot less and we still have to pay our own insurance to boot, or just go about with runny noses all winter from lack of doctorial care and what business is it of yours if I want the Party Pack instead of two of the Weekend Whoopie size boxes?
So anyways, the template is calling to me. "Change me!" it cries. "Recolor me!" it moans. "Spank me like the naughty template I am and call me Shirley!" I do feel, though, that I've jerked off given enough time to blog prettification, what with changing the little art gallery down at the bottom of the sidebar on a semi-regular basis, and revamping the banner once in a bit, and redoing the photo up near the top off and on.... but is it enough?
Probably not, to judge from past experience. (Remember the big blackout a few months back? That was me, dissatisfied with the way the lights were connected in that mini-space the property manager calls the dining area, only who can "dine" in three square feet unless you stand up and hold the plate by its hot edges and gobble real fast and I ask you, is that just an invitation for heartburn not to mention a newly-made op to clean the freakin' rug? And where the hell am I going to get cleaning supplies?)
Then I figured, what better lends itself to revampage than the blogroll? Aren't entire posts devoted solely to the angst of linking, delinking, relinking, unkinking, not thinking, more drinking, I'm sinking......
Where was I?
Oh yeah... blogroll. I don't really know if I'm legally entitled to call it a blogroll, seeing as how I don't use Blogrolling, since I'm an old-fashioned girl with old-fashioned ways and I add my links in one by one by one by hand, mainly because I just cannot face the prospect of yet another password to remember. So I guess I could shuffle up the links, maybe take out a few I don't read very often for one reason or another. I know I'm not LGF or Instapudding or whatever, a link from me don't mean squat in this mean old world, Tilly, and a delink is unlikely to set off a flamewar or trigger self-destructive psychosis, unless of course you get off on that kind of thing and far be it from me to pass judgement on whatever flips your switch, I mean, I remember back in the day when I was a hormone-fueled love machine and oh the tales I could tell but can't really because when the hormone fuel ran out so did the brain cells and what were we talking about?
Oh yeah.... unlinking.
Well, point of the matter is, if there is one, is that I'm wondering... is there a set etiquette for linking? Is it necessary to have some kind of public blog-breakdown and disown everyone, delete the whole list, repent, recant, and relink, lather rinse repeat? Is an explanation necessary? ("I delinked Fred today because I discovered he was a sheep buggerer, and only tips 10%.") Is it required to email the potential unlinkee to give them time to plead their case, send me money, or kiss my ass?
Or can I just willy-nilly cut and unpaste to my little heart's content? And what the hell is a nilly anyway? Why do willies have them? Is the nilly that little veiny bit at the end, near the mushroomy part? Why do I care, as long as I have batteries?
And do I need more coffee?
Posted by LeeAnn at October 17, 2003 06:05 AMAlways opt for more coffee and you can't go wrong.
Tomes have been written on the subject of de-linkage, and in the end, everybody does whatever they want to. Ceremonial delinkage is usually a cry for attention, however, so I'd go with the stealthy de-linkage, and if anyone notices that means you can blame the raccons in the template for eating the quotaion marks and say you never meant to de-link THEM....
Posted by: Susie at October 17, 2003 10:34 AMAnd everyone knows template racoons all are minions of Zoot.
Posted by: LeeAnn at October 17, 2003 10:44 AMOooooh......bad, naughty Zoot.
Screw ceremonial delinking. It smacks of melodrama and sucks.
However, emphasizing one blogger in particular above all others.....perhaps...someone....like.....er....no.....exactly.......me.......is definitely appropriate and should have tons of fanfare. I'm just saying.
As for template tweaking, go google TopStyle. Download the free version and play with it. It gives you everything you need. I'd come show you how it works but I don't think the monkeys necessarily want to be exposed to this goo in my lungs (tasty though it is.)
Posted by: Da Goddess at October 18, 2003 10:27 PMOh... delinking. I seriously need to delink some more blogs because I keep adding two or three or eight every week but it's like trying to clean out my closet. I'll vow to be ruthless and get rid of lots and lots of stuff but but when I actually start looking through it I can't bear to throw out more than one or two, if any at all. I have blogs on my list that haven't been updated in months but they have sentimental value, you see so I can't drop them from the list.
Hard as it is though, I do occasionally de-link. Usually it's just blogs I compulsively linked and then never looked at again but even if it's because the blogger pissed me off I always de-link quietly and discretely. I've only had one blogger get bent out of shape about being de-linked but he's generally pretty bent out of shape to start with.
Right now I'm working on a major redesign of my links page which I might finish in a month or two or might just forget about and scrap completely. If I finish it I might happen to lose a few links.
Take the template you have now, and transpher it into a word document and save it. Then you can do what ever you wnat, and if you mess it up, you can always go back to the begining.
Posted by: Mookie at October 19, 2003 05:33 PMMy blogroll are my bookmarks really. I do go through and delink blogs I never read anymore every once in a while, or my blogroll would be as big as China :)
Posted by: Ith at October 20, 2003 08:48 AMI got it. LOL
Posted by: Shirley Template at October 20, 2003 04:02 PMYes.
Posted by: Pixy Misa at October 20, 2003 07:49 PM